Liking the idea of someone reddit

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Liking the idea of someone reddit

Our wants and needs will often blend in with our realities, changing the way we perceive something or someone to be. Emotions that arise from one experience can influence the way we perceive other experiences, other interactions, other individuals.

Relationships between the right two individuals have failed plenty of times, just as the relationships between the wrong individuals have succeeded -- for at least a good period of time before the inevitable separation or misery. We want to be loved, cared for. We want to be attended to, complimented, treated with kindness. Every once in a while, we want someone there to share experiences with, to share thoughts with, to share ideas, jokes, laughter with.

Loneliness can be brutal. Everyone wants his or her independence, wants to be single and living life on his or her own, until loneliness comes sneaking in. But even with distractions, they only last so long. People change.

liking the idea of someone reddit

I know some refuse to believe this, but they do. Sure, we may not be capable of changing every bit of ourselves, but we can change significant parts of us, of our mentality, of the way we see the world and approach problems, even the way we treat people.

Sometimes people change to worse versions of themselves. Some would argue they are to blame. Others would argue the circumstances that led them to make the choices they did are what ought to be blamed, but pinpointing the blame, either way, is pointless.

We can argue nature vs. When it comes to love, we like to remember how great things once were, hoping they can be just as great once again. Why the discrepancy in honeymoon phase length?

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It takes different people different amounts of time to either get to know someone or to open themselves up and allow someone to get to know them. But on the contrary, we manage to fill those spaces with our imaginations. By Paul Hudson. Love is incredibly complex. Sometimes we want to be more than just ourselves… we want to be a pair of souls. In fact, because the mind is so complex, we somehow manage to lose ourselves within it. Sometimes we hold on to the person he or she once was, not the person he or she now is.

We only see what we want to see, not what we need to see. Some phases last for weeks, others last months and few even a couple of years. About Contact Newsletter Terms Privacy.In society, comes a world of curiosity, when it comes to romance. A lot of guys and girls become questionable to one another at first glance, when it comes to meeting one another in person. Any guy as well as any girl can have a personality that is either filled with a clear or mysterious end because of how much they understand each other.

A guy who meets a girl or a girl who meets a guy does not always lead to a guaranteed opportunity of forming a relationship with one another. This idea formulates the fact that different points of views of a guy and a girl, who can critically make relationships very difficult for each other to start. This transition can be relentlessly undesirable for an individual to mate with someone because not only are they judged by the first impression, but they will be labeled as a part of the friend zone or love zone to tell whether or not you have an interest for them.

This is one of the factors that will also determine if they are just a thought or if they are really worth liking. However, other people say that you should judge someone based on personality rather than looks. Usually when someone finds their lover, there is mainly an attractive property that sparks their attention in any occasion. This idea is hard to believe because generation after generation, the perception of how to approach a mate changes based on the person.

This shows that the personality of an individual is different and can sometimes matter more than the appearance when it comes to the best characteristic of attraction. Nowadays, most millennials do a little of both when it comes to approaching one another. This question could help prevent any conflict meeting or dating an individual before starting off on rough relationship with them.

You have to find a way to maneuver genuine communication in order to maintain a stable status of a person so that eventually, their feedback point of view could bounce back at you.

Welcome back. Sign in to comment to your favorite stories, participate in your community and interact with your friends. Always be careful and aware of who you date. James Madison. This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator. Subscribe to our Newsletter.

Spoiler Alerts Ahead! Community The best and only Lyft driver I've ever had. Fordham University. Orlando, Florida. Community Parasite: A Must-See. Most Viewed. Best of Entertainment. Communities Creators Join. Facebook Comments.I'm wondering what's the difference between liking the person vs. For example a father figure or if younger a boyfriend? Very often its quite easy to put someone on a pedestal i.

Thats the idea of a person we like. I feel like this exactly for someone thats how I know. I even told her. Not really who they are. Thats why so many marriages fail come rd year or whatever. Liking someone FOR their flaws as well as for being themselves is true liking.

But more specifically your examples, a father figure Or you could mean when you see a father figure as being 'ideal' but in actual fact you find him to be quite disappointing? I dont know. But yes, generally it doesnt have to be about 'romantic relationships' at all. And manipulative as I am told.

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But I refused to see that because of this idea of a maternal longing and becuase I chose to see only what I wanted to in her. I still adore her which is the odd thing. But in my case, I see her flaws. I didnt understand the question completely but if you can replace that person in your mind then its the idea you are interested in. Well, you see pop in the number Umberger is the name of my dog cats are deilicious devil people. Number number number hey jay kay talk aloud to yourself crazy.

Answer Save. Favorite Answer. Yes this is possible and youre right there is a difference Very often its quite easy to put someone on a pedestal i. Hope this helps. How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer. Jeff Geyer. Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.You fell for them before you had a comprehensive view of who they were as a person, because you were more interested in who you could invent them to be.

There seems to always be a disconnect between how you imagined your partner would react to a given situation and how they actually react. In reality, the responses your partner gives you in conversation often frustrate or disappoint you. You value the idea of your partner rather than your actual partner. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday.

You may unsubscribe at any time. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. Allef Vinicius 1. You fell for them hard and fast. You enjoy daydreaming about your relationship almost more than you enjoy engaging in it. You find yourself regularly frustrated by their responses. You selectively ignore certain things they say or do, because they do not line up with the person you like to think of them as.

More From Thought Catalog. Get our newsletter every Friday! You're in! Follow Thought Catalog. Post to Cancel.This is quite normal. Humans are ordinary creatures with depressingly similar inner lives. If this sounds like you, you might want to try falling in love with the Idea of Someone.

The Idea of Someone is extremely adaptable. Do they like your hair style? Do they support your new hobby? Not one bit. Your Idea of Someone may be politically moderate, but slightly more left-leaning around your friends, and slightly more right-leaning around your parents.

liking the idea of someone reddit

Your Idea of Someone could be a business major—no, wait, a double major in finance and philosophy? They are left and right brained.

liking the idea of someone reddit

Funny and kind. Unlike anyone who has previously walked the earth! From your high-school relationship, you will take a slice of familiarity. The Idea of Someone will have green eyes and, on summer nights, will climb up to the rooftop of the gym with you, where you will smoke cigarettes together. From your college partner, you will extract a love for the arts. And, in the comfort of your double bed, in a glittering moment of intimacy, you will recite poems back to them, from memory.

Finally, someone will understand you the way only an imaginary person can. From your first adult partner, your Idea of Someone will inherit reliability and a can-do attitude. This facet of your Idea of Someone will have no trouble making and following through with plans, and will enjoy when you take the reins, too.

They will offer impossibly hilarious observations about day-to-day life, the kind you will reflect on at P. Your first introduction might be some kind of frustratingly quirky meet-cute. Yes, the Idea of Someone will come into your life when you least expect it. As your mind goes and your body deteriorates and you find yourself utterly alone, the Idea of Someone will comfort you, humor you even. Or maybe not?

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By Jessica Olie n. By Tasneem Raj a. The cartoonist joins Emma and Colin to talk about the characters in her cartoon world. Olivia de Recat has been contributing cartoons and writing to The New Yorker since Read More. Daily Shout s.If you've ever had an intense crush on someone you barely know, the rush of feelings you get whenever you see or think of them can feel a lot like love.

More often than not, you love the idea of that person and who they could possibly be to you rather than who they actually are. But this can happen in relationships as well. So how do you know if your partner is actually in love with you or just loves the idea of you? People who tend to fall in love with idea of someone can be checklist daters.

People are dynamic and multi-layered, he says. Superficial qualities like looks, income, status, and what the inside of someone's apartment looks like should be the last thing anyone cares about if you're looking for a real relationship. When you're already dating someone, you can only hope they love you for who you are. If you suspect that's not entirely the case, here are some signs that your partner might loves the idea of you, according to experts.

At the beginning of a relationship, it can be difficult to figure out who someone really is and what their true intentions are. But you should reach a certain point in your relationship where you can comfortably show your true and authentic selves to each other. So if you don't feel comfortable showing your partner who you really are, take note. One telltale sign that your partner just likes the idea of you is they invest themselves entirely in who you can become.

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Although it's great to have a supportive partner who pushes you to reach your highest potential, it can become a problem as time goes on. If you start feeling like you aren't good enough as is because your partner keeps encouraging you to change in some way, they might not love you for who you are. Your partner should never make you feel like you're a project. Relationships, even the happiest, healthiest, and most compatible ones, require work.

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But as Vikki Zieglerdivorce attorney and relationship expert, tells Bustle, "Sometimes people think they are ready for a relationship but they only want to deal with the easy parts and none of the hard stuff.

As Ziegler says, it actually takes work to keep a long-lasting and meaningful relationship functioning smoothly. That means both partners need to be open enough to share and be vulnerable.

When you are dating someone who loves you, they should be interested in your wellbeing and overall happiness. Instead, "someone who's just dating you for personal gratification may not be driven by this and won't feel responsible for any of your feelings," Ziegler says. So pay attention to how your partner responds when you bring up any concerns about the relationship. If they seem uninterested in talking things out in a mature way, they just may be with you because they love the idea of being in a relationship.

If a deeper connection is what you want, you may need to reconsider where things are at with your partner. If your partner's idea of a perfect date is a party or group event where they can show you off to all of their friends, they may just love the idea of your relationship. Since they don't want to keep showing up alone, they might find themselves in a relationship with anyone.

It's hard to tell what someone's true motivations for being with you are. But if your partner would rather take you out to group hangouts than have one-on-one dates, they may just love the idea of being with you. Sure, this may seem like a dream scenario for some, but according to Trescott, this is a major sign of someone who tends to fall in love with the idea of a person rather than the person themselves.

But always remember, details matter. For instance, if you've mentioned that you hate seafood but your partner surprises you with reservations to the newest seafood restaurant in town, that's a red flag to watch out for. Small details may not matter much, but if your partner really doesn't take the time to learn your likes, dislikes, and who you really are, they may just love the idea of a relationship.

If you're with someone who might love the idea of you, it may be a good idea to take a step back and ask yourself if you're really in love with them. If everything else seems to line up for you, then maybe having an open conversation with your partner can help them to get to know the real you.

But if you realize you're only in love with the idea of them as well, it may be time to figure out if that's what you really want.We've all been infatuated by someone, whether it was the guy you sat next to in your Psych class or the girl you always saw at the gym.

liking the idea of someone reddit

But when we get to know these people, we realize we're really only crushing on the idea of them, not the actual people. But, not every boy you meet will be your Prince Charming and not every girl you encounter will be your Cinderella. Here's what happens when you only like the "idea" of someone:.

You wanted to have the same interests because you thought you liked him or her, and you believed he or she was worth listening to a day's worth of rap music for. Whatever this person was doing wrong, you were there to justify it.

He or she was filling the void inside of you, and you didn't want that to stop. You thought he was the full package, but his personality lacked depth.

The way she talked about herself, how she treated strangers and how she reacted in bad situations were all things very unappealing to you.

No thanks, you'd rather eat a donut. Their mysterious natures were meant to stay mysterious, and the small infatuations you had with them were nothing more than harmless crushes.

The Idea of Someone

You created the people you wanted them to be, and they just didn't measure up. By Ashley Grates. When you're in love with the idea of love, you fall for anything that smiles at you. From the beginning of time, fairy tales have given us a distorted view of love. They make us think falling in love can happen at the bar on a random Thursday night.

Here's what happens when you only like the "idea" of someone: 1. This is great — don't get me wrong — but we both know you were there for all the wrong reasons.

5 Signs You’re In Love With The Idea Of Someone (Rather Than Their Reality)

Unfortunately, you thought wrong. You defended this person. He's not self-absorbed! He's outgoing! I heard he had anger issues, so that must've been it. Look at her, she looks harmless! This person is perfect There is a huge difference.

Once you got to know this person, you realized he or she was nothing special. Ah, blinded by love or, in this case, infatuation.

What's difference between liking the person and liking the idea?

You simply enjoyed the attention he or she gave you and nothing more. Some people are better left observed from afar. I mean, of course, you were in love with the ideas of these people. About Contact Newsletter Terms Privacy.


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